How it should have ended
by Randoms 'R' Us
Summary: Yes, yet another Twilight HISHE. But you know you want to read it really... right? Can't actually remember the storyline of this as I wrote it so long ago - all I know is that it's unfinished... So, your reading experience of this will be a little like a lucky dip; you know there is a good chance that what's inside will be rubbish, but you go for it anyway, just in case...
1. Chapter 1

He came out of the forest, slowly at first, as if to check that the way was clear, but then moved faster as he saw that the playground was deserted. He moved fast and silently, like a ghost, stopping only when he found what he was looking for. Instinct told him that this was dangerous, but longing pushed him on, made him slip through the window. She was as beautiful as ever. He watched, and waited, hoping that he might hear her voice once more, even if she was asleep. But there was nothing. Bella lay peacefully, silently, no longer wrestling with nightmares as she had all those years ago. He hovered near the window, ready to leave at a second's notice, unable to tear his eyes away, to miss a second. He heard a sound and left, swiftly. Back to the woods, to hide and to watch. Just one more day, he told himself, but deep down he knew he would not, could not, leave until he had spoken to her one last time and satisfied himself that she was happy.

Bella sat in the garden, watching the children play together. Seth and Embry, 5 and 3 respectively, were making a den out of a hollow oak tree that Jacob had cut a hole in for them to use as a door. Bella hadn't trusted it at first, and had begged Jacob to block it off, and save it for when they were older, but he had gently refused her, and she had relented. Bella was 25 now, and Jacob 24, although they still kept their joke about age – it was childish, to keep a joke for that long, but Bella liked it. It was a good life, she reflected, as she watched her children play together. They had their father's eyes.

Jacob, indoors, saw a figure heading for their house. A horribly familiar figure...but no, it couldn't be. Edward would not return to torment Bella after all these years. Would he?

Bella looked away from her children to see someone at the gate. A lanky boy with untidy, bronze-coloured hair, curiously golden eyes and skin that was unnaturally pale. He seemed a little familiar. She rose to greet him, and paused. There was something...almost threatening about him, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

"Seth, Embry," she called her children to her reflexively, to keep them safe. The children ran over to her. "Go inside," she told them, "you can watch tv for half an hour." Delighted, the children rushed inside. Their mother never allowed them to watch television during the day, especially not when it wasn't raining.

Bella raised her eyes to meet the stranger's.

"Bella," he murmured, a strange yearning in his voice. The fog that had covered her memory of her adolescent years began to clear.

_Then there are the stories about the cold ones_

She shook her head hard, to clear it. She was an adult now, she couldn't believe in fairytales.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" she asked the boy.

"My name is Edward Cullen," he said, "We were at school together,"

Memories, again, like echoes, trying to break down her barrier between the past and the present, between reality and dreams. Then Jacob was in front of her, his hands at Edward's throat.

"Jacob, he's a guest," Bella reprimanded him.

"He's no guest, Bella, he just wants to hurt you again,"

"Again?"

_if she stopped looking for him, it was over...tripped...stayed down...curled up on the wet bracken...nothing left in her to upset..._

"Let him talk, Jacob," said Bella, giving in as she realised that the barrier was crumbling, and this would be the easiest surrender. Jacob looked doubtful, but released Edward.

"Bella," he said again, "I...I'm so, so sorry," he paused, unsure of what to say, "I shouldn't have left you. It...hurt too much...for both of us," Bella looked up, startled, as his words burst the floodgates. She remembered everything. And she wasn't ready to forgive.


	2. Chapter 2

"Go away, Edward," Bella said, her voice hard, "Leave us alone,"

"Bella," Edward pleaded, "Don't do this. You were my life. You still are..."

"Don't try to sweet-talk me Edward Cullen," Bella spat, "You left me. Alone. And when you weren't there for me, Jacob was. You might have been important to me when I was a teenager, but I'm not so easily dazzled now. Just get out and leave me alone,"

"Please..."

"No," she snapped, "I don't want to know,"

"Alice misses you," he said quietly, "so does the rest of my family..."

"Don't make this about your family, Edward. I know it's not. I can see right through you now. This isn't about Alice, this is about you, you being selfish. You didn't want me back then, why would you want me now?"

"Bella, I lied. I had to, to keep you safe..."

"Well a great job you did of that! I could have died so many times since you pulled your disappearing act,"

Edward was stunned. "What do you mean?"

"Well, first there was Laurent, who would have killed me had Jake and his friends not killed him first, and then Victoria came back with her army of vampires trying to kill me off. The wolves dealt with them too,"

"See, you were perfectly safe – the wolves protected you..."

"No, Edward," Bella cut him off, fury in her eyes, "They saved _my_ life, but do you have any idea of the cost? They lost three of their pack! You've seen my children, Seth and Embry? They have no idea about their namesakes. And you want to know who the other casualty was? Leah Clearwater. She didn't even like me. She died trying to save Seth..." Bella broke down into tears. Instantly, Jacob's arms were around her.

"Get out, Cullen. I never want to see you again," he growled.

Edward started to leave, but aimed a parting shot, "Tell me if you ever_ imprint, _wolf-boy,"

"If I do," Jacob told him, "it will be with Bella."

That night, Bella was restless. Hiding under her window, Edward heard, and hoped that Jacob was awake to hear too, as Bella worried about the truth. In sleep, her barrier against his mindreading was pointless, as she told him all he needed to know.

"Still love you," she murmured, "But I can't...NO!" He heard her scream and the bed creaked, he assumed as she bolted upright. He heard Jacob's reassurances, and slipped silently away. He had heard what he needed to know.


	3. Chapter 3

Bella was doing the ironing when she heard the doorbell. Assuming it was Jake, coming home early, she hurried to the door, and opened it wide. And froze. You would've thought she'd been expecting this, she reflected, he wasn't going to give up that easily.

"You," she spat.

"Yes, Bella, me," replied Edward, "I heard you talking in your sleep last week, after our first encounter,"

"That means nothing," said Bella coldly, defiantly, "It doesn't matter what I said in my sleep. I don't want you here. I want you to go away, and leave me alone. What happened between us, that's in the past,"

"Bella, please, one more chance? I can give you anything you want, so much more than _he _can..."

"So, you've given up on the self-sacrificing talk then? I knew it was all lies, the minute you left me,"

"I can turn you now, I'm ready, you can become like me, like you wanted, just imagine it, Bella. Please? The life we could have. The eternity. We can have all we ever wanted..."

"That's not what I want, anymore," Bella spoke more gently now, seeing his desperation, "I want my children, I want to live, breathe, grow old. I want everything you told me I would want because you know what? You _were _right. I want to be human. Plain, boring, normal, human. And I made the right choice. I'm sorry, Edward, but I've chosen Jake. And I'm not going back on that,"

"Bella," he said, as if soothing a child, "Bella, this is more than wanting you. I need you, Bella. You haven't left my mind since I left you here. You're like food, water, air to me,"

"You don't need food, water or air," Bella told him, sadly, "You can survive without them, remember? Not breathing gets uncomfortable, that's all. And you can survive that. See, Edward, you don't need me, you're just being selfish,"

"So what if I am?" he exploded, his eyes darkening, "Weren't you selfish, when you abandoned your friends to pine after me for 4 months? Weren't you selfish when you wanted me to stay in Forks even after I said you weren't good for me? Even though you thought I was leaving for my own good, you made me feel so guilty it hurt? And what about Jacob? He monopolised you, he took advantage of the fact that you felt hurt and let down, he made you forget me...tell me those aren't the actions of a selfish man, Bella,"

"He didn't make me forget," Bella whispered, "I did,"

"Why?"

"I went and stood at the edge of the cliff that I'd seen people cliff-diving off. I took off my jacket and stood so that my toes hung off the edge. I felt my balance begin to go, tilted forward slightly, and felt the wind against my skin as I fell. I hit my head on the way down, and woke up in hospital. I couldn't remember much, but after a while most of it came back. Except for you. I didn't remember moving to Forks or anything about highschool. It was like starting over. No-one mentioned you to me. They probably thought it best that you stayed forgotten,"

"Was it deliberate?" his face was, if possible, paler than usual. "Bella?_ Was it deliberate?_"

"I'm sorry, Edward," she nodded. "I had to try,"

"You could have died!" he shouted, furious.

"I didn't care, Edward. By that point, it was that or death. I left it to the sea to decide," Edward was shaking, whether from horror or anger Bella couldn't tell. She took a nervous step back, but before she could do any more he was inside, the door was closed and he was kissing her, furiously, passionately kissing her. She tried to push him away but it was no good, he was too strong. Eventually, he stopped, and just looked at her. Angry tears were running down her face as she tried to hold back sobs.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I shouldn't have done that," But he wasn't sorry. He had forced her to become once again the lost teenager of 7 years ago, torn between two boys. He had found the scar where her heart had once broken, the heart that Jacob had so carefully put back together, and he was pulling at it, ripping her apart once again. He loved her, and she loved him back, albeit unwillingly. And he loved it.

Bella was furious. How could he do this to her? What was the point, when he knew that she couldn't leave Jacob, especially not for a teenager. Because, she knew, that was what he still was, and what he always would be. She was older now, and married. But her heart ached for him, and she wanted him, so much that it hurt, so much that she almost cried out.

"Go," she said, coming back to her senses, "Go now, the children will be home soon, and I have things to do,"

"Can I see you again?"

Bella relented. "Meet me tomorrow, at...umm...one o'clock...in the park,"

"Where exactly?" his golden eyes bored into her, and she felt her heart quicken.

"By the big oak, the one with...carvings on," she said reluctantly. Apart from the playground, it was the only landmark she could think of, and the playground would be crowded. She didn't want to be seen.

"I'll see you then," Edward told her, and disappeared. Bella closed the door, and sank to her knees. What had she done? If Jacob found out, what would she tell him? And what about the children? She had to, though, she tried to convince herself. One meeting, that was all. She would persuade Edward that it just couldn't be, he would leave her alone and she would go back to her life. It was just...a small voice in the back of her head murmured _but can you persuade yourself? _


	4. Chapter 4

Bella wasn't herself at the minute, Jacob reflected that night. She had seemed clumsy this evening, but it was almost as if she was having to make a conscious effort to keep her hands steady. He wondered if her encounter with Edward had shaken her up more than he had thought. He would take her out for a meal, perhaps tomorrow night, to try and put her more at ease, to show her that it hadn't affected their relationship. Bella's restless monologue cut into his thoughts,

"Why did you leave me? It wasn't fair. I should hate you but...No, I love Jacob, can't leave Jacob...Not going through that again, don't want to get hurt, Seth and Embry need me, my children, couldn't have children with you..."

He knew who she was talking about. It was strange, though, she hadn't been sleep-talking much, just that one night, after...but she couldn't have seen him again, could she? He wouldn't dare...but if he was that desperate... _Admit it, you would've _said the small voice in his head _You wouldn't have let it be, there's no way, not if there was the slightest glimmer of a chance,_ he brushed the thought away impatiently. _It doesn't matter what I would've done,_ he told himself, _What matters is how it is now._ He debated whether to wake Bella up, to ask her...but it was just a suspicion, and she was tired. He'd ask in the morning, there was no need to wake her now. He turned over, but didn't fall asleep until almost sunrise, kept awake by his suspicions.

Outside the house, just within hearing, Edward listened. He knew now what he was going to do.


End file.
